Flying to Fort Wayne today

Surgery ended just fine. Dr. Greco let me do more incisions, my sutures were looking better than ever and I wielded the Bovey decently. It's only been two days and I'm already missing the OR. There's something special about that place.

You, as the surgeon, are the boss as only a Navy Captain on the high seas can experience. The patient's wellbeing is your direct responsibility so you govern everything that happens. Unlike a Captain, you use your hands and mind to fix someone. You have to stay on top of meds, coags, fluids, nutrition, co-morbidities, H&H, pain, patient comfort (they can't feel abrasions) and more. And of course, it's fairly technical. There's some old tech (forceps, scissors) mixed in with a ton of new tech (Ligasure, GIA, A-grams, mesh, etc.).

I still believe the sacrifice is too great on family to go through five years of Jedi Knight/monk training (total dedication). Plus I'm long past my twenties. So it's kind of a sad farewell to the specialty. I may have rotations in surgery during Residency, and I may get opportunities to first assist for my patients in practice, but I'll never look through my mask/visor at my double-gloved hands in someone's abdomen with the sense that this could be my career.

The shelf test on Friday was ok, but some questions were ridiculous. As an example, one asked what anatomical anomaly causes hernias. Uhm, what kind of hernia? Incisional and spigellian are rectus sheath defects. Direct Inguinal are tranversalis fascia. Indirect Inguinal are from a patent process vaginalis. You get the idea...

I think I passed, and that's really all that matters. But I learned so much surgical knowledge and skills, I had hoped to do really well. Our Clinical Education is too amateurish for fair assessment, hence the Pass/Fail grading system.

The boys did very well in their first "real" swim meet yesterday. Now we have times for them to beat next season. In Phoenix the season ends in Spring because it's too hot to hold outdoor meets in the Summer! They really like their coach, so they will probably swim through the summer. This assumes Becky and I can work out childcare between her job, my didactics and Boards preparation and both of our work-out schedules. After the meet we prepared for Connor's 11th B-day sleepover. Any remaining time I've spent preparing for the Fort Wayne trip.

Becky and I are determined to get into better shape and lose some weight, but it's difficult with my travel. I read that there's a pool I can use in Fort Wayne, and I'll have a car. Plus the hours shouldn't be the 80+ schedule of surgery. Regardless is going to be a long month of hospital food, uncomfortable beds, new people and jobs, etc. I just hope that the three weeks of Family and one week of Emergency will give me the information and firsthand experience necessary to decide which specialty is the best fit.

I still have to finish the paperwork for my research rotation after Fort Wayne. I'm looking forward to the reduced hours, close proximity and return to some research. But I really hope the exposure to RadOnc will be enough to rule it out or make me 100% sure it's worth the effort to go for. The 70 or so spots across the country are so competitive you have to prepare extremely well for interviews and applications. I just heard that one of our MSIV classmates was thinking Psych and changed to RadOnc late, then matched at a great program! I have to find out who it is and talk to this person.

Almost forgot, I spent time with the radiologist in Show Low checking out what they do. I love the interventional part of it. Placing tubes, running A-grams and nuclear studies, placing rads guided markers and lines, etc. But they spend a lot of time in dark rooms with big screens rapidly talking into their microphones. Procedures with actual patients are their breaks. They try to dictate 100+ studies per day. I'm too much of a people person to be happy in Rads.

Of course Rads has reasonable hours and makes a truckload of dough. I think Rads, Derm and Anesthesia are examples of overpaid specialties. They all make more than surgeons while surgeons have more responsibility, at least as long residencies, higher malpractice, worse hours and more stress. And Medicare wants to reduce their compensation 25% in the next few years! That just doesn't make any sense at all.

An hour or so until we drive to the airport. I sure hope this month is going to be worth it...